Today’s going to be a history for me in terms of tears I shed in a movie. It’s a record breaking one since I watched “The fault in our stars”. This film called “Holding the man” is about these two boys who fell in love with each other when they were in High School and the story went on after that following a timeline regarding what happened to them through the years. The best thing about the movie was that it was based on a true story.
Not only it was about a romance between two guys but also it tackled some serious issues gays faced in the 80’s and 90’s era like parents being against homosexual relationships, society unpreparedness for such change, and most importantly AIDS. I think there is always a misconception in peoples’ mind that just because a guy is gay he is automatically activated to catch some AIDS anytime soon. That pre-judgmental mindset was wrong in a lot of ways. You only get AIDS if you have sex with multiple guys or girls without using protection but as long as you stay loyal and monogamous to your partner, guaranteed you will live longer just like everyone else.
Almost all the gay themed films I watched ended in a tragic way – this one included. It sucks that one character has to always die. John and Tim have such a great chemistry together and in one fleeting moment, everything changed and things began to fall apart. I learned that life is a sacred thing to value. It will give you options on how to enjoy it all you want but from those options you picked will determine how your tomorrow will turn out. Life is not selfish.
I cried consistently from the last 30 minutes on wards. I didn’t even think I had the chance to pause and rest. I just felt sad and heartbroken and miserable and I let the film destroy me because that’s how it’s supposed to make me feel – make me feel like a real human being with raw emotions. Honestly, at this point as I am writing this, I feel like I still have a residual value and haven’t fully recovered from what I’ve just seen. That’s how powerful the movie is to me.
I realize that whatever’s going to happen to me in the next couple weeks that will follow is destined. Life, the universe, or God knows exactly what’s beating inside my heart but if that’s not what’s planned for me then I think I’ll just have to follow. The future is always uncertain. I might enjoy so much today and weep tomorrow, who knows? What’s important is to always keep one foot ahead of you and let the other stay where it is.