Random Thoughts v.02

I still have one more year in college. Or maybe more than one year if in case I can’t finish my course in the right time. School is still part of my life and that means I have to spend time with people I have built friendships with for the last couple of years. If you’re going to ask me if I want to share time with these people, I have to answer you an immediate yes basically because I need them. If I can just stand alone and roam around the school without having to bother with these living creatures then I can just abandon them anytime I want. But I can’t because again, I need them. Though not in a desperate kind of need. It’s just I have no other option. 

My patience about college is thin to none. The same applies with my relationship with friends. I know it’s rude of me to say that but I don’t know, I guess I just want to leave already and not to see these people again forever. But I still have 365 days or more to go and it breaks my heart thinking this. I know it’s a bad luck to count days out one by one because they say it will just prolong the days I’m intending to have. However I can not help it. 365 days, hopefully.

Of course there are few people I want to get contact with as soon as I get out of that school. I have made a mental note of that. Apparently, those people are the ones who treat me like I’m important. Like my whole existence matters to them. And I really appreciate that . I have always said that it takes time to know people who really care and that they are the ones worth keeping in touch for 3-4 years from now. One thing is for sure, my words are good. 

I’m just so glad I have a chance to think things out. Like while walking on the beach shore. I have to say it’s the best experience of my life. You know, the smell of beach air, the late afternoon sun, the sound of the waves, while reminding myself my goals and dreams in life. I would not trade that moment for anything else. Back to reality, I have three hundred and sixty five days. That must be a hell lot of time but I will just bear the situation and mentally order myself that I have to be nice to people even if they are constantly rude to me. Three hundred and sixty five days and I won’t see them ever. 

I’m happy I get this off my chest. Writing really helps sometimes.

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The Queer Diary

How did this whole thing started in the first place? Well I think ever since I was a kid, I've always wanted to express myself . Sure I could have picked painting, singing, dancing, playing instruments, crafting, or any of those lovely forms of artistry as a medium for me to channel my thoughts and emotions, but in writing is where my heart belongs. Technically, I had no degree in writing but that doesn't make me less of a writer. I have no idea what the future has in store for me but I've always known deep down in my heart that I want to write. P.S. if you reach this site then please know that I am thankful that you give time for this and that you like to read. Also, no matter what you're going through, believe me when I say things will get better.

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