A new year letter for Jason.

 The first time I’ve had a quick glance to you is in the place where I usually spend my free time whenever I’m occasionally experiencing social withdrawal. I know you haven’t notice my secret gaze at that moment but I already have countless questions inside my mind. Few days follow and I realize that you always stay in that place as well. I believe I have no special feelings towards you yet at that time for the reason that I am not interested in romance and the fact that I’m battling with loneliness everyday. It just so happens that my curiousity arouse since I recognize you as a new student in the house. Furthermore, I am surprised when I see you applying to be a member of our organization. However, I still don’t feel anything unusual. We’ve done an interview and just almost 3 inches away from each other, considering this, I am supposed to be attracted to you. Unfortunately, my world remains as gray as it is and even you can not turn it into somewhat colorful. Nothing follows as interview ends. Instead, I have decided to get attracted, as if fascination is a decision, with two of your co-applicants, to which I end up settling down with one that I choose not to name.

With so much effort, I have tried my best to know him better. Contrary to that, I have contemplated that there is no amount of chance that he might like me at the end of the story. So after that, it’s the time when loneliness invades and resides back within me again, laughing as if it has an idea that this would happen. Until the night before Christmas, where I feel wrecked and destroyed as solitude exhausts me to death. There you come and pluck the strings of my heart that have been long unused. You have no idea how you turn my feeling better. More than anything, you save me. And I’m forever thankful that in the time when people all over the world are busy and joyfully celebrating Christmas, you are the only one who shares time just to have a conversation with me. Then, finally, I proclaim to myself that I like you, principally because you have proven something that none of my peers have proven yet.

I don’t assure myself that there is a chance between us, but I want you to know that I am really grateful you come into my life. You aren’t just a new acquaintance to me but a special someone at the same time.

P.S. You double my Happiness last New Year’s Eve.


Published by

The Queer Diary

How did this whole thing started in the first place? Well I think ever since I was a kid, I've always wanted to express myself . Sure I could have picked painting, singing, dancing, playing instruments, crafting, or any of those lovely forms of artistry as a medium for me to channel my thoughts and emotions, but in writing is where my heart belongs. Technically, I had no degree in writing but that doesn't make me less of a writer. I have no idea what the future has in store for me but I've always known deep down in my heart that I want to write. P.S. if you reach this site then please know that I am thankful that you give time for this and that you like to read. Also, no matter what you're going through, believe me when I say things will get better.

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